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NEWSFLASH



I know it's not exactly meteorites, but I got a good laugh from this piece,
emailed to me by a friend. I thought I'd share it with the list.

Geoff Notkin

*      *      *

AIR FORCE DENIES STORIES OF UFO CRASH

Valles Marineris (MPI) - A spokesthing for Mars Air Force denounced as
false rumors that an alien space craft crashed in the desert, outside of
Ares Vallis. Appearing at a press conference today, General Rgrmrmy The
Lesser, stated that "the object was, in fact, a harmless high-altitude
weather balloon, not an alien spacecraft."

The story broke late Friday night when a major stationed at nearby Ares
Vallis Air Force Base contacted the Valles Marineris Daily Record with a
story about a strange, balloon-shaped object which allegedly came down in
the nearby desert, "bouncing" several times before coming to a stop,
"deflating in a sudden explosion of alien gases." Minutes later, General
Rgrmrmy The Lesser contacted the Daily Record telepathically to contradict
the earlier report.

General Rgrmrmy The Lesser stated that hysterical stories of a detachable
vehicle roaming across the Martian desert were blatant fiction, provoked by
incidences involving swamp gas. But the general public has been slow to
accept the Air Force's explanation of recent events, preferring to
speculate on the "other-worldly" nature of the crash debris. Conspiracy
theorists have condemned Rgrmrmy's statements as evidence of "an obvious
government cover-up," pointing out that Mars has no swamps.